We are never not broken

Akhilandeshvari by Paola Suarez
Akhilandeshvari by Paola Suarez

Transformation, in my experience, sometimes requires navigating through some nasty territory: “Joe, watch out for the alligators!” my friend Rich counseled me one day during my divorce. I’ve come to realize that the real value of meditation, breathwork, etc., is the way it builds resilience, the way it strengthens the ‘inner gyroscope.’ Resilience is only going to become more important as life speeds up and as we gain more and more power by way of technology. Resilience and transformative learning are what I strive to teach.

She who is never not broken. Akhilandeshvari is a Goddess whose power is in the heartbreak, the soulbreak, and all the breaks life deals us. Now that I know of her, I am grateful to have Akhilandeshvari’s energy to work with when I feel shattered and broken. She reminds me to see these times as opportunities to grow and remake myself. -Paola Suarez

Never Not Broken

Akhilandeshwari reminds us that in transitions, when we are metamorphosing and are no longer the caterpillar and not yet the butterfly, there is a wonderful opportunity to choose how we want to put ourselves back together. How will we recreate ourselves? How will we transform our old hurts, current pains, and future goals? How will we ever grow and change if we already had this all figured out? We are constantly breaking down to build back up an authentic self.


Hindi goddess Akhilandeshvari
Hindi goddess Akhilandeshvari
"Watch out for the alligators, Joe!" -Joseph Roberson 2012
“Watch out for the alligators, Joe!” -Joseph Roberson 2012
Akhilandeshvari Nataraj -Joseph Roberson 2014
Akhilandeshvari Nataraj -Joseph Roberson 2014
Akhilandeshvari & Wheel of Fortune -Joseph Roberson 2014

The iBook is coming along!

Courage, Wisdom, Serenity through breath-centered practices
Courage, Wisdom, Serenity through breath-centered practices

NadaBrahma: love is an altered state


Love may well be the ultimate altered state.

The term altered state usually implies something extremely different from day to day life. More often than not, drugs are involved. While my experiences with altered states have involved illegal drugs, that was long ago. Most of my experiences with altered states happen during meditation, breathwork, art-making, and love and sex.

The kind of altered state I’m describing in this post, however, is the experience of love that happens during the Altered States workshop. I did not always see altered states this way. I did not always think of this workshop as a way of creating spiritual love. That sounds odd and pretentious, don’t you think? But I have been led by the practice itself, by Osho’s NadaBrahma Meditation especially, to this conclusion. My experience leading this workshop many, many times has led me here.

What happens is, after 30 minutes of humming mmmmmmmm (like when we do endless Om but without the O sound), the body becomes a tuning fork. The gentle humming massages the organs and releases tensions. It feels as though the body is an empty reed, a wind instrument. Every body in the room vibrates together. This simple droning, these shared sea-waves of sound, interpenetrate each choral body.

In addition to this toning, I have added some things to the original meditation. I play the gong and provide verbal guidance. The gong complements and amplifies the humming. In particular, the gong vibrates the spine from base to crown. Its Chaladni patterns change as they move up and down the keyboard of chakras. This journey through the chakras continues up and down the spiral staircase until we arrive and settle into the heart. By this point the humming, the vibrating, and the chakra meditation have delivered you home to yourself. I don’t know the details, but I understand that part of the blissed-out state here comes from increased carbon dioxide in the blood. I have read studies documenting such elevated levels of carbon dioxide, relative to the ratio of oxygen, in meditators. Whatever the physiological basis, the experience is heavenly.

At the end of this powerful meditation, the heart chakra opens, radiating gold and green in every direction. You have become the sun. You know yourself to be the source of light, warmth, and love. And so is every other person around you! The room is ablaze with one sea-field of gold and green love energy. The group radiates as one!

Love is the ultimate altered state!